ensuitepilgrim's Blog

“The collective principle asserts that… no society can legitimately call itself civilised if a sick person is denied medical aid because of lack of means.”

—Aneurin Bevan, In Place of Fear, p. 100

Being more house bound than I am used to , leads to different ways of using the time.Eg, 15 minutes of lunchtime news, late breakfasts and even moments of contemplation.
This morning, as I lay awake, summoning the enthusiasm to disentangle myself from my additional tubes and bags,I tried to factor in what the costs of my recent treatments would be , if I was so unfortunate to live in the USA, for example?
Then, as I got to my feet and tentatively walked to the door ( after detaching myself! ),I realised how much better I felt ,compared to the day before.
This might all seem rather prosaic ,but it compelled me to think about “feeling better” and what it can entail.
Taking a visit to hospital,as an example,recently I have made several trips.
I go because , to put it at its simplest, something is wrong with me; I feel worse for wear, a broken bone,a stroke,whatever….
In my experience, and not only recently,invariably ,I shall come home feeling better, though not always immediately.
By ” better”, I am not only referring to the improvement in my physical well- being, but mentally, as well.
This is brought about by witnessing the care and compassion of those who work in the NHS; in A & E, on the wards, in the clinics and theatres.
I have experienced uplifting scenes of demonstrable patience with the elderly; dignity respected.
Tiny acts of kindness that no Tory- Coalition suit would write in to a Job Spec.
Beggar the the thought!
These everyday clement and decent blessings bestowed upon us all.
By witnessing such magnanimity,I am bettered as a person,I hope.

The “uncivilised”, political forces that would seek the disintegration of the NHS,need reminding of another Nye Bevan Bon Mot:-

“The National Health service and the Welfare State have come to be used as interchangeable terms, and in the mouths of some people as terms of reproach. Why this is so it is not difficult to understand, if you view everything from the angle of a strictly individualistic competitive society. A free health service is pure Socialism and as such it is opposed to the hedonism of capitalist society.”

—Aneurin Bevan, In Place of Fear
Where in the current political landslip, is there a figure with such fire, vigour and cogency?
Begging your indulgence….

Just like that!
The only discomfort I felt was the application of ice-cold gel to my back, before the procedure; I was cheerily informed by the staff nurse- I apologised for my strangulated intake of breath.
Every care was taken by the team, everything explained by a very caring and competent staff, in the Angiography Unit.
The consultant radiologist explained to me that the procedure had been both very necessary and a success.
After recovering from the mild sedation, back in the suite,the nurse explained that I had two Urostomy – like bags attached to my lower back, to collect the urine.
These would remain intact and in place for a week,when they would be removed, stitches,too.
The nurse then appeared with two similar bags which were connected to the fixed bags by hose, attached to my legs by extension,enabling me to empty the contents as necessary.
Like walking around with two , low-slung gun holsters!
Four bags now, in addition to my original Urostomy, which for now, seems to be by- passed by new additions.
For the last six months, bedtime has become a familiar routine; attach my bag to a purpose designed ” overnight bag”, which is duly emptied and rinsed every morning – this can contain a night’s worth of up to a litre- too much detail!
However, my new, additional bags only have a 600 mill. capacity.
Logistics would suggest two overnight bags in addition to the regular bag!

Thank goodness it is only for a week.

No big walks this week,exercise probably limited to cooking dinner.
However, can drive from tomorrow; Berkhamsted on Friday.

“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
—Frank Herbert, Dune

That’s about as close to a resolution I’m going to make.
Resolutions at this time of year? Not feasible.
Mid June might be a time more sympathetic to achievement.

2014 has passed,thank god and new year begins with more hospital appointments.
Last year averaged almost one a week !
Good news; bad news?
Well, I am off Warfarin, after a call from my consultant, who also informed me that as a result of a recent kidney scan, I should need further treatment of possible , sluggish passing of urine through the conduits ,fashioned during the big op. in July.
I am not to be unduly concerned by this procedure , apparently.
So, presuming there are no problems ascertained during my pre- op. appointment, I go in for the day on 19 th January ,for Percutaneous Nephrostomy.
Sound awful doesn’t it?
However, it only means a local anaesthetic, given in the Angiography suite, followed by an incision to allow a temporary catheter to be attached to the kidney, the other end of which will be attached to a bag to drain off urine.
It is a procedure used to remove kidney stones.
It should only take 20 minutes or so, followed by rest and supervision, hopefully not more than the day itself.

For myself , apart from a seasonal cold, I feel really well most days and have resumed regular walks in the locality, averaging 13 minutes a KM, which is an improvement.
Whether I shall get back to a 12 minute KM, will depend on the amount of walking I can do, in the next months.
I do not intend to let hospital appointments etc; to become a barrier.

“Sometimes I can hear my bones straining under the weight of all the lives I’m not living.”
—Jonathan Safran Foer, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

I hope everyone that finds time to read the Blog has a healthy and harmonious new year and if Resolutions have been made, every good wish for their fulfilment.
Thanks as always to my wonderful family,just for being themselves.